Seventeen Years: Preparing Myself for the Next Chapter

I am notoriously nostalgic. At any given point in my day – I can be found reflecting on mistakes from yesterday, reviewing regrets from last month, or missing moments from years ago. It’s brutal. I’ll catch myself, snap out of it and somehow function throughout the day. The reel that so often plays in my head, it not only distracts and disables me from being in the present – but emotionally makes me relive times I have already endured. Some good, some bad, some even exaggerated from what actually truly transpired. Imagine doom-scrolling through memories in your head and you have a sense of what I go through daily.

My first-born son Ishaan is applying for colleges right now. He’s a senior in high school, already completed his college standardized admissions tests (SAT & ACT), and is essentially starting to work through the Common App, apply for scholarships, and narrow down some possible majors he may be interested in pursuing. Through hard work with some God-given intelligence and talent, he has accomplished being captain of his school’s tennis team, co-founded several clubs, kept his GPA up while taking (and passing) 13 AP courses, officially completed the math and reading Kumon curriculum, and was recently announced a National Merit semi-finalist.

I remember coming home from my residency program, and helping a kindergarten version of this same kid learn to write his letters. He had an imagination that had him being a school car-line attendant one day, and a Transformer the next. To this day, he still battles Beyblades with his younger brother, crushes his family at Catan, and plays pickleball and tennis every chance he gets. I cannot believe the same kid that (in his teens mind you) once left the house without shoes or sandals on, is well on his way to being a high school graduate!

Ishaan is seriously enthusiastic about everything. He never says “no” to anything or anyone. Except corn, he hates corn for some strange reason. I love that about him, he certainly squeezes every drop out of his life that he can. In a lot of respects, he is your typical teenager – consumed by his phone, horribly dietary choices and hygiene habits; but when he busts out a random ‘bagel’ or ‘boba’ dance, you often get to see that beautiful innocence and youthful spirit of his come through. I love that he lives his life with so much fervor, it makes him fun to be around and it is one of the qualities I’ll miss most when he goes!

You will never have this day with your children again. Tomorrow they’ll be a little older than they were today. This day is a gift.”
— Melia Keeton-Digby

When Ishaan was about a week old, I remember taking him to the OB/GYN’s office for a wellness check. As I was walking into the waiting area, I vividly remember a woman telling me to “cherish this time with him, they grow up so fast.” That really stuck with me! I am so blessed that, while I did (and still do) work a decent amount – I had ample time to watch both my kids grow up. The paradox though is why do I feel like it just happened so quickly? Time just flies when you’re a parent. Something that always wrecks me is the social media pages that remind you this may be the “one day you will pick up your child and set them down for the very last time without even realizing it.”

I do not know what the future has in store for Ishaan. As a family, we have to weigh tuition costs against name recognition of the school, and factor in that he still does not quite know what he wants to pursue. Our local university is ‘ick’ or ‘cringe’ as kids these days may say – so, hopefully he chooses to go somewhere else. Not that I wouldn’t miss him dearly, not that I wouldn’t love seeing four more years of his bagel dance; he’s just an amazingly awesome individual and I think he’s capable of something far better.

A side-by-side photo showing the same boy at two different ages. On the left, he is a young child with a broken arm, wearing a red polo shirt and smiling. On the right, he is a teenager holding a sign that says 'ISHHAAN, first day of 12th Grade, I am 16 years old, when I grow up I want to be a Doctor, Musician, DATE: 8/10/26,' standing outdoors.

Ishaan recently passed his driving test and drove himself to school for the very first time! Before that, I had the pleasure of dropping him off every morning. We listen to about 3 or 4 songs together, wish each other a good day, and I let him take his tennis bag and backpack out of the trunk and watch him make his way to his first period class. Now, that too may be a fleeting moment for me!

I find myself counting down the days until Ishaan’s graduation ceremony, until his college acceptance letter comes in, and until we drive him out to his dorm – wherever that may be. I feel like, rather than being melancholy and dreading those upcoming events, my time is probably better spent focusing on appreciating the moments I get to spend with him now. Who knows, maybe I’ll try and go lift him for the last time and pray that my back doesn’t give out on me!

Don’t get me wrong though, I have some serious concerns about Ishaan’s survival skills! So far, his idea of ‘cooking for himself’ constitutes him pulling and pouring a big bowl of cereal out of the pantry. He can solve complex Calculus problems, but somehow doing a load of laundry eludes him. Either he’s banking on Optimus or one of these other autonomous robots to do a lot of his daily chores, or he fully believes his mom is moving in to the dorms with him.

Thank you for reading this post! I need to write more often, it helps me unpack my emotions about things and I hope someone out there connects and relates to some of what I say! Be well, and be sure to enjoy the precious time with your kids and loved ones!

Uncertainty and Unemployment

Dentistry, Lifestyle

My start to the new year came with an unexpected surprise – the dental office I work at was to be permanently closed come the end of January 2026. The very practice I have worked at for the past 10 years, that one! Apparently the company decided the cost of repairing some structural issues in the building, combined with an unaccommodating (borderline negligent) landlord, made it not worth renewing the lease on. The company’s director came down to the office on Monday, January 5th (our first day back after a brief holiday break) and informed us all that we would be closing our doors at the end of the month and being laid-off in the process. Me personally, I was shocked by the news. Some staff members later confessed they saw it coming months earlier – apparently, the company had my lead assistant doing inventory checks and some other suspicious activity that now makes a lot more sense in hindsight. Regardless, the past month has been filled with uncertainty to say the least.

The company was quick to notify families that another location they own was available to them for continued dental care and hastily tried to funnel them across town. Saying goodbye to the families I did see this past month was really hard. I have enjoyed their trust and loyalty to our office for over a decade – it’s actually quite surreal to think that much time has passed. Many families were kind enough to share their disbelief and dismay when they got the news – after all, I have literally seen their kids grow up. I reciprocated in saying how astonished and sad I was to leave that location and went on to thank them for entrusting me all these years.

I am sitting here trying to harness my emotions from that day when I first heard I’m being let go. I guess if I had to find one word to describe it, it would be ‘bitterness.’ I think when you are corporately owned, there is a detachment and an almost callous indifference to who gets impacted by decisions often made by people high-up and far removed from the operations on the ground. Most of the staff at this location became unemployed, lots of families that enjoyed our service need to find another dental provider; but none of the human element is factored into their decision-making process as we are just seen as insufficient numbers on a spreadsheet to these captains of industry.

This is the third job I’ve lost throughout my life. The first time, I was young (in my 20’s) – lived at home still, and the family support really made that layoff almost seem insignificant (if not welcomed). That was still while I was in my I.T. era, and the job I worked was from the hours of midnight to 8 am doing phone support, sooooo…good riddance? In 2015, I was working part-time at this current practice, when I lost my second job as a (pediatric) dentist with another group – which also helped lighten the burden of being fired. Maybe it is the 10-years of my life I spent here, but this most recent firing stings so much worse than any time before.

Thankfully I consider myself financially stable and responsible. With the help of my wife, we have lived below our means for some time – we’ve saved an adequate emergency fund, possess a diversified retirement portfolio, and suitably control our monthly expenses. Push come to shove, we will have to forfeit some tennis and piano lessons for our kids, eat out a little less, and skip that trip to Hawaii this year – but, thankfully a lot of the sacrificing we have done over the years affords us some peace of mind that we won’t starve or be homeless any time soon.

Another blessing in disguise as it turns out, has been keeping good relations within the community of dental professionals around me. After reaching out to share the news of our closure, to my surprise, so many offices welcomed a chance to meet and discuss employment opportunities or even a partnership collaboration. I was very touched. In some weird turn of events, it is looking like I may be even more busy now then when I worked my full-time job.

“When God closes a door, he opens a window”

Nearly a month out now – the initial shock has settled and I am feeling quite optimistic about what the future holds. I remember speaking on previous posts about why I favor associateship – and while everyone’s experiences are different and it really is a case-by-case basis – at this point in my career I see more value in ownership, in equity, in doing something for yourself. I still have little to no faith in corporate loyalty towards its employees and I think most individuals are better off investing in themselves. That said, I am grateful that the associate position allowed me ample time to see my kids grow up and freedom from the stressors of running a business.

I am liking the prospects 2026 has in store. My New Year’s resolution is to not be in my head so much about undergoing change, but rather to embrace it and basically let the universe take the wheel. What are your thoughts? My apologies to anyone who reads my posts; it’s been an incredibly big gap – we got a dog – and there is a lot more I probably need to write about! Feel free to comment on your thoughts about change, and I’ll try and write again soon! Thanks for taking the time to read this one!

Adulting

Lifestyle

This coming week, I will be turning 44 years old. I have always hated celebrating birthdays – whether it’s my deep-rooted anxiety about getting older, or perhaps it’s my introvertedness and never wanting to be the center of attention – but I will say, this one does not seem so bad. I am usually a roller-coaster of emotions, so tomorrow (or this afternoon) I may feel differently; but right now, in this moment, I have to say I feel rather accepting (almost welcoming) of it.

Where am I at in my life? Married to a beautiful woman and I have two bright, talented boys. I have a job that surrounds me with incredible co-workers, affords me time with my family, and provides me a solid paycheck. Other than some steady hairloss, I am overall pretty healthy and have high aspirations to get into better shape still. I have personal and professional growth opportunities that make the coming year an exciting one for me.

Adulting is stressful and hard. We have bills (and very soon, taxes) to pay and self-care to maintain. We have young people to raise and elderly parents to care for. We have a tremendous number of responsibilities to balance on our plate every day.

What I have found helps my mental health the most is taking care of my physical health. I am starting to control my diet more regularly, take the daily vitamins and supplements my doctor recommends, exercise as often as I can (at least 3-4x weekly), and sleep about 7-8 hours a night.

I think personal development is also critical to help minimize stress. We have to keep growing as individuals and developing new skills. I read blogs daily and am currently on the book “The Millionaire Next Door” by Thomas J. Stanley and William D. Danko. While I don’t have much in the way of hobbies and interests; I get on the tennis court with my kids every chance I get, I try and do an early-morning coffee run with some friends once a month, and my boys and I love playing NHL 23 (Go Knights Go!) on the PS5 together.

While I think its significantly important for people to set goals, I’ll admit I never was very good at it. I encourage my kids to do it all the time; whether it be the grades they want to achieve in school this semester, how many songs they want to learn on the piano this month, etc.. For me, my career goals would basically be to finally open my own practice. I am terrified of having to deal with staffing issues, payroll and HR responsibilities, worrying about supply costs, complying with sterilization standards – basically everything I have been blissfully oblivious to these past nine years that have been somebody else’s concern. What I am learning though, is getting out of that comfort zone mentality and taking on risk is really what makes life worth living.

You made it through another day
You did it, let’s celebrate
~Sia

We have such little time here on Earth. I think as I get older, I think I am coming to realize, don’t sweat the small stuff. Find the people in your life you enjoy keeping company with, set some goals and work arduously towards achieving them, be sure to count your blessings – life is too short! I just wanted to throw a post out there today, sorry if it came off as random. I’ll hopefully be writing again real soon to give updates on my Exercise Expedition as well as sharing some exciting career news! Until then, enjoy your day and thank you for visiting this post!

Nascence

Lifestyle

My initial posts I am dedicating to topics that I believe define me as a person and/or have in someway greatly influenced my life. Even as I sit to write this, I am not entirely sure I know how or where to begin.

For the most part, I had a happy childhood. My upbringing was in a loving, hard-working, middle-class home. I do not remember ever wanting for much, but I was easily pleased. I was content with the small plastic toys I found at the bottom of cereal boxes, and pretty much played outside most afternoons with neighborhood kids. In middle school, I started collecting sports cards, discovering music, and became interested in video game consoles. My dad was (is?) an architect and my mother a customer service representative at a nearby bank. My siblings and I were fortunate enough to never go hungry, could always afford the school supplies we needed, and were blessed to have something to unwrap on birthdays and Christmas morning.

However, we were far from spoiled. For years, my mom did this thing where she would let us unwrap all the presents but only actually open up and play with one or two. The rest we were allowed to access throughout the year. I grew up thinking that was normal. It’s not. That frugality though, did (in some cruel way) teach me a lot about delayed gratification.

Come to think of it, I cannot recall any extravagances from my youth. Literally, ALL of our family vacations were to visit other family members – which was a short list of relatives and places. As a result of that, I do not have any experience camping, or skiing, or boating, or…doing a lot of stuff. I don’t mean to complain. I feel blessed for what I had and give thanks to my parents for all I was fortunate enough to have received. But the truth is, certain experiences I was bereft of, I am unfortunately starting to realize I am reluctant to offer to my own children.

A couple more memories that come to mind…I was ‘teased’ for brief periods of my life; in middle-school the popularity of the Aladdin movie made me an easy target (even though I wasn’t Middle Eastern?); and of course there was my ‘favorite’ Simpsons stereo-typical Indian ‘Apu’ character which, although I bore no physical resemblance to, did not stop some kids from wanting me to do the accent for. Elementary school was a bit worse as they took a foreign and unusual name like ‘Sulabh’ (phonetically ‘Sue-lub’) and ignorantly pronounced it ‘Slob’. The emotional trauma and scars from that likely led me to give my boys easier names to pronounce (i.e. ‘Ishaan’ and ‘Krish’).

In hindsight, maybe wearing vests wasn’t the best idea…

I remember in middle school the pressure to start smoking cigarettes started to emerge, as kids I was friends with started to form the habit. I was never tempted however, not because all the public media campaigns said not to, but rather that my parents never touched the stuff and because of that, smoking never appealed to me. It was a divisive thing however, I fell out of touch with those friends and started to find less…precarious (?) kids to associate with. To this day, I have never smoked a cigarette. Alcohol, totally different story (probably enough content there to merit another blog post of its own).

High school got a bit easier for me, if you can imagine that? Some might say, it was a ‘whole new world’…pun intended. But yeah, maybe because it was a fresh start; new faces, bigger stage and a bit easier to keep with the crowd you like, and distance yourself from the ones you don’t. Fresh off all the name calling from elementary and middle school, I briefly tried to adopt the nickname ‘Sal’ in high-school but after realizing I very easily could be confused with someone of Hispanic origin, I ultimately decided to try and make ‘Sulabh’ work.

For the most part, I kept my head down. I spoke in a previous post (Introvert) about not wanting any attention; and for the most part, I accomplished that through high school. I did have one memorable encounter where the kid next to me in chemistry class somehow took notice of the fact that my Payless bought shoes were actually (and ironically?) branded ‘Nucleus’ and he would go on and announce it to the whole class by randomly yelling out the word and then pointing directly to my shoes. Like I said, no extravagances….sigh.

College brought on a whole lot of new experiences for me. I will save that era for another post, probably something like Nascence Part II. I hope you enjoyed the post. Hopefully someone out there can relate to some of the experiences I had growing up. Always feel free to share! Thanks, see you soon!