Hiding My Hair Loss

Lifestyle, Uncategorized

This next post has been a long time coming. On this site, I have written about my astounding student loan debt, my parenting faux pas, my time as president of an organization, and even a disconcerting medical condition that occurred to me fairly recently. Perhaps the reason I have been so reluctant to write this next post is because I have spent so much time, effort and money over the years trying to conceal this problem in the first place. Well, without further ado, here is a little tale about my struggles with hair loss.

In my early 20’s, I started noticing a few hairs on my head started to go scraggly. Even more distressing were the ones that would shed outright; usually discovered to my dismay while shampooing in the shower. Certain, close family members of mine (i.e. uncles) had an early history of hair loss; but my father retained a healthy mane well into fifties and sixties, and my mother (while thin) didn’t have any appreciable alopecic areas on her head. Please note, there can be genetic (e.g. family history, male sex hormones) and/or environmental (e.g. stress, nutritional deficiencies, thyroid conditions, etc.) causes to hair loss – I would strongly encourage everyone to seek the true etiology before starting on any particular treatments and therapies.

I just knew mine was not your normal ‘ordinary day’ hair loss. I started noticing discernable areas of my scalp in the mirror. By 23 years old, I took it upon myself to start visiting dermatologists and hair-transplant consultants to see what my options are. My form of hair loss, as best as I can tell, is the typical male pattern baldness known as androgenic alopecia. Back then (and perhaps even now?), the Norwood Scale was used to gauge the various patterns and stages of balding.

The Norwood Scale

Fortunately for much of my twenties and thirties, I fell under a Norwood stage I classification – where, especially when styled just right, there was not much noticeable change in the hairline or elsewhere. Now, in my forties, I have progressed to a stage III/IV where the hairs on my vertex/crown have more appreciably thinned and there is more generalized loss within my front and mid-scalp sections.

The dermatologist I saw in my twenties (and who has since retired) was a family friend of ours. With great reluctance, he prescribed me Propecia to help slow my hair loss. I say “reluctance” because, however rare, it may have sexual and other adverse side effects. He also made me promise that, when my wife and I decide to start a family, I stop taking the medication for several weeks (preferably months) prior to trying to conceive in case it may cause some unintended birth defects in our unborn child. Again, please consult a health care professional before starting any particular treatment; but personally I credit this medicine for retaining much of what I have left on my head today.

As I’m sure we all do in times of weakness and vulnerability, I turned to the Internet for answers. Forums like Hairlosstalk.com became my obsession, and I was constantly seeking other cocktails, potions, elixirs, “cures”, what have you to supplement and help stop (or better yet, reverse) my hair loss. Let me assure you, men’s hair loss is a multi-billion dollar (and growing) industry and there is no shortage of ‘strand-restoring’ products out there. Perhaps it was the recommendation of strangers online, or simply succumbing to the brilliant advertising and the promises of “stimulating regrowth” and “reactivating hair follicles” on the Rogaine packaging; but soon after starting Propecia – I found myself also applying 5% Minoxidil topically 2x a day.

Propecia and Minoxidil was my hair loss treatment regimen for over a decade, with relatively decent results. The scraggly hairs were no longer an issue, and hairs would still fall out in the shower, but in what seemed like more stable, ordinary amounts. I purchased expensive shampoo’s (e.g. Revita Hair Growth Stimulating Shampoo), tried vitamins (e.g. Viviscal Pro), used a micro-needling roller a few times a week, and even bought a laser helmet (e.g. Theradome EVO Laser Hair Growth Device) – but nothing really helped to any significantly appreciable degree.

About a year or so ago, I started noticing my hair receding in more substantive amounts again. I don’t know if there was elevated stress from the whole Covid-19 time period, I don’t know if maybe the tolerance or the efficacy for the medications I have been taking has started to reach its limit, it’s impossible to say. Nonetheless, it has concerned me enough that I have again started up consultations with dermatologists and hair-transplant specialists.

So far, the consensus among the three or four doctors (some dermatologists, some surgeons) I have met with (in-person or virtually) is that I am still not an ideal candidate for a hair-transplant (either FUT or FUE) procedure. While, in some strange way, that feels reassuring to hear – I am constantly paranoid about this problem progressing. My most recent research into hair loss remedies has introduced me to PRP (Platlet-Rich Plasma) Injections – which seems to be gaining popularity for this and other health conditions. Pricing and the recommendation on frequency seems to vary among providers, but I am resolved that this will be the next logical therapy in my desperate attempt to slow/stop my hair from falling out.

I would be remiss if I did not mention the psychological ramifications in all of this. While I recognize (and appreciate) that I am a lot better off than some male men in their forties, I can’t help but feel down, depressed, and distraught about my decrepit appearance. I already know my facial type is not fortunate enough to look good with a bald head, like the Bruce Willis or Dwayne Johnson’s of the world. I hate being so vain, and already struggle emphatically with aging and my fleeting youth. I spend SO much time trying to hide and disguise the problem; time I could spend with my kids, reading, exercising, just all-around bettering myself. So much expended energy worrying about how many strands I have waiting on the shower floor or in my comb. While I didn’t experience any erectile disfunction (thankfully), it is hard to pinpoint the hormonal changes that happen when you’re on medications (especially, electively) and the negative effects it may have on testosterone production and energy levels. I wish I could come to terms with it, accept and embrace it, age gracefully and focus on what really matters in life. For me (and many others suffering a similar fate), having hair is very much integrated into our identity, our self-esteem and our self-confidence; it a symbol of our youth, virility and feeling of attractiveness – and not so easy to let go of.

So, on that propounder-ing note, I thank you for reading this latest post. As with so many other topics, I wish I had better photographic documentation to incorporate in this post. Please feel free to contact me or leave any comments to discuss your own personal story and struggles.

4 thoughts on “Hiding My Hair Loss

  1. Having read this I thought it was very informative. I appreciate you spending some time and effort to put this information together. I once again find myself personally spending a significant amount of time both reading and leaving comments. But so what, it was still worth it!

    Like

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